Latest Tweets:

theobiwan:

clamjob:

ifollowbadblogs:

If you cloned yourself and then got a handjob from your clone, is that incest, homosexual, or masturbation?

its a sin thats what it is

I don’t know why I laughed so hard at this.

(via psychoticfangirlramblings)

marozia:

I’M A MESS WHO LET ME ADULT

(Source: capetian, via psychoticfangirlramblings)

teawithaview:

Have you ever started to check your tumblr in the middle of getting dressed and half an hour later you’re still standing in your underwear with one sock on and also 15 minutes late.

(via doctor-quoi)

troncats:

sorry:

I read an article the other day that said, “if you drink every day you are an alcoholic.” Thank god I only drink every night

why do text posts these days sound like they are quotes from a 40 year old mother’s facebook

(Source: sorry, via splders)

neatpotatoes:

astoldbygengar:

guys, be honest! can you tell this picture of me winking is retouched??

uGH THIS IS NATURAL BEAUTY AT ITS FINEST 

neatpotatoes:

astoldbygengar:

guys, be honest! can you tell this picture of me winking is retouched??

uGH THIS IS NATURAL BEAUTY AT ITS FINEST 

(via ven0moth)

nerds-are-cool:

i-is-andy:

should I open the door

you should open the door

nerds-are-cool:

i-is-andy:

should I open the door

you should open the door

(via theunbecomingofourstars)

farrahtales:

If you don’t strategically eat your food so that the last bites to go in your mouth are the tastiest look at your choices

(via magnusbane)

dggeoff:

dggeoff:

my family got me a vibrating toothbrush that i can most definitely use to masturbate and finally get off gdi but the only problem here is that it’s got mike wasowskis face on it and i don’t know if im ready for that level of commitment

i did it. i did it and i hate myself.

(via carry-on-my-wayward-butt)

unfaggy:

i just want to be famous to see who i will be shipped with

(via fuckyeahstydia)

tumbleweedsinmyvagina:

br0kend0wnangel:

a-local-meth-lab:

THESE ARE SOOOOO GOOD. WHERE DO YOU BUY THESE?!?!?!

No one knows where, they just always appeared and you never not ate it..

Grandma’s purse

tumbleweedsinmyvagina:

br0kend0wnangel:

a-local-meth-lab:

THESE ARE SOOOOO GOOD.
WHERE DO YOU BUY THESE?!?!?!

No one knows where, they just always appeared and you never not ate it..

Grandma’s purse

(Source: tuviejaentangarosa, via fuckyeahstydia)